Distractions, distractions, distractions Nov02 '05

After reading this Not-To-Do list, I realized that I should probably come up with my own.

Some of the items on that list (that I just linked to) are very funny, because they also apply to me - but many of them were "extremes." I think it’s perfectly OK to have a balance between life, and work.

So, without further ado - what follows is my list of things that I should not be doing - either at work, or at home - before I attempt to begin a project. These items are pure distractions, and if a project or task needs to be done, these items just delay me from even beginning the project.

When you see the phrase [drifting], that means I am going down one road, for too long, and I need to re-trace my steps, to get back to what I was doing. I mention these items in the third person, because they could apply to anyone.

This list is accurate, as of today. In other words, these items apply to this point in time. In fact, you could probably chalk this up to a single day, recently.

So... in order to start a project, on time - and to use your time effectively,...

• Do not check to see who is currently on instant messenger.
• Do not check your blog comments.
• Do not read other blogs, and write comments there.
• Do not write a new blog post.
• Do not check Flickr for the latest photos under "interestingness."
• Do not leave comments for photos at Flickr.
• Do not "Add to Favorites," for any photos at Flickr.
• Do not "Add to Contacts," for any new people at Flickr.
• Do not keep looking at your own photos on Flickr; refreshing the page, to see if any new "Views" appear under your photos.
• Do not count how many photo Sets you have on Flickr.

[drifting]

• Do not check your Fantasy football stats, at Yahoo.
• Do not check the latest NBA scores, from last night, at ESPN.com.
• Do not check to see if there are Bulls tickets available, for their next home game - even though you know, damn well, there are.
• Do not check to see if there are any Bulls tickets in Milwaukee, for when they play the Bucks.
• Do not start looking at every NBA team’s web site, to see how they differ.
• Do not start thinking about buying an authentic NBA player jersey, because you like the design - but which you will never wear anyway.
• Do not start thinking about life in the NBA.

[drifting]

• Do not open iTunes, and see if your iPod is still connected.
• Do not check to see if your iPod is fully charged.
• Do not make a new Smart Playlist, titled, "In the bathroom."
• Do not check the iTunes Music Store for new releases, of which you can’t afford, anyway.
• Do not start listening to samples of new releases.
• Do not start thinking of really old songs, from your youth, and searching for them on iTunes.
• Do not open iTunes Preferences, and begin playing around with the "Import" settings, even though you know the settings are fine.
• Do not start listening to music, and bopping your head, like you’re on top of the world.

• Do not check your bank account, online.
• Do not get upset that a recent transaction hasn’t posted yet.
• Do not try to figure out a better way to save money.
• Do not start thinking about that dinner last night, which cost $40 - and which is now, apparently, damaging any chance you have at retirement.
• Do not get upset that you currently don’t have any money.

• Do not check your Netflix queue, for recent shipments.
• Do not browse the Netflix site for new movies, to add to your queue.
• Do not start thinking of movies you saw a long time ago, of which you’d like to rate, at Netflix.
• Do not start watching your Netflix movie rentals.
• Do not start thinking of how fortunate you are, to be able to have a computer, and DVD player, at your disposal - any time you want.
• Do not go to the mailbox, and wait for your latest Netflix shipments to arrive.
• Do not go outside, to see if the mailman is approaching, even though it’s only 7:30 in the morning.
• Do not start thinking of other things you are expecting to receive in the mail today, including orders from Amazon.com, and bills.

• Do not start shredding random pieces of paper, in your paper shredder.
• Do not wander into the kitchen, to eat your seventh breakfast of the day.
• Do not stare out the windows of your kitchen, thinking about your old high school days.
• Do not notice the squirrel on the fence outside, chewing on something.
• Do not start thinking about the weather, and how much you miss running through the sprinkler, on your front lawn.

[drifting]

• Do not pet the dog, on your way back up to your room.
• Do not start talking to the dog, like it’s a small child, who can understand what you mean.
• Do not give the dog kisses.
• Do not start imagining what life must be like for a dog - just sleeping all day.
• Do not notice other dogs outside, with their owners, chasing after rubber balls.
• Do not think of taking the dog for a quick walk.

• Do not pick up your guitar, and start strumming random chords.
• Do not pretend you are this excellent guitarist, simply because you know where to put your fingers.
• Do not get upset that you aren’t an excellent guitarist.
• Do not start thinking about when Eddie Vedder started playing a guitar.
• Do not think of that Pearl Jam show, at AllState Arena, a decade ago, which was probably the best concert you’ve ever seen.

[drifting]

• Do not check your email, in the hopes that some long-lost friend decided to email you.
• Do not check old web sites you used to maintain, to see if (whoever is in charge) has made any drastic changes.
• Do not keep re-filling your glass of water.
• Do not keep adding items to this list. GET TO WORK! STOP F*-ING AROUND!

Categories: Efficiency , Personal

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